Whole Food, Plant-based Bikini Model Training – Part 2
I am 6 weeks out. I have not signed up for my competition yet. I am nervous. So, I am stalling. I have really been afraid that I am unable. That I just don’t have what it takes. It’s such a silly thing in some ways, because we hear all the time that we can do anything – and I truly believe that! For other people though, not for myself.
Move Your Body and Your Mind Will Follow
So, how do I change my mindset? Well, I haven’t stopped training. I haven’t given up on eating clean and healthy. So, I suppose the answer is that I just keep going. I learned a long, long time ago that we cannot change our minds first. We have to move our bodies first and our minds will follow – they quite literally have no choice. So, I have continued to move my body. That is how I am dealing with this. That is how I deal a lot of things! I just keep moving!
Move It Or Lose It
I am working out 6 days a week, which is really no different than my normal. This is not just going to the gym. I do not actually like the gym that much. I just get active. I take a walk during my lunch break at work. Or I take my dog for an extra long walk in the mornings. I take the stairs instead of the elevator. Those things count and living an active lifestyle is so incredibly important. Move or lose it – for real. If we don’t move our bodies our muscles atrophy. This is not theory. It is fact. I have seen it with my own eyes.
Whole Body Living
Just over 1 year ago, I broke my foot (read more here). Annihilated it actually. Shattered it really. Fractured 6+ bones and dislocated it in 3 places. It was a nightmare. I was riding my bike and it suddenly fell apart. The handlebars started to sink into the base of the bike and I lost control. I stuck my foot out, instinctually, to slow myself down, but I was going way too fast for that and my foot got caught on the ground while the rest of my body kept going. The force just shattered everything along the way. I screamed, help came and I was rushed to the hospital. I spent 2 days in the hospital and was returned home with orders to stay completely off my foot for 12 weeks! That’s 3 full months! Within just 2 weeks, the muscles in the my calf were jelly.
Only two weeks without using my leg at all and my calf had already shrunk to 1/2 the size of my other calf! That is two weeks, folks. This is without use of my entire leg of course. But, what exercises do you do? Do you do the same thing every day? Wouldn’t it make sense, if we are not using ALL our muscles, ALL of our bodies in various and different ways then, wouldn’t we experience some sort of atrophy in the muscles we don’t use as much? Yes! Makes sense to me! Muscles get used a bit by association, I realize that and my case was extreme. But still, this is WHOLE BODY LIVING!
Never Underestimate the Power of a Good Walk
We have to get out there! We have to move! Our bodies depend on us for that and we depend on our bodies! You really do not know and cannot fully understand what your health and your body and your ability to move means — until you lose it. And I hope you NEVER lose it! But it might be the only thing that will help you to move that butt! ANYTHING helps! Never underestimate the power of a good walk! Never underestimate taking the stairs! You do not have to pay $100+ for pilates classes or spin classes or yoga. Just go for a walk! Walk up a hill! Do that couple times of day and your body will LOVE you for it! Can you imagine not being able to walk? Not being able to climb stairs. Literally UNABLE! Well, I was unable. And only for 12 weeks. But boy, what a gift to get that back! I have that ability back! I lost it and now it’s back! Thank God. I am LUCKY.
I Want to Quit
Now, I have to be honest. Even with all this knowledge, I still feel like I want to quit this thing! I want to go get a huge stack of pancakes and a piece of chocolate cake, go home to bed and call it a day! But, I am not going to. It is not bravado that gets me through. I am not full of ego here. I power through with logic and experience only. I don’t need quotes about “striving for the best” or whatever. I know, in my gut, my heart and my soul and from direct experience, that if I quit I feel like shit. Do I want to feel like shit? No. So, the only other option is to keep going. That’s logic. I have quit so many things so many times in my life. I have been swallowed by fear and so I just quit. I run out the back door, I never show up again, I skip town. No joke. But over the years, the pain of these missed opportunities has almost killed me – from the inside out. The inner torture has been almost unbearable at times. Why didn’t I just STICK IT OUT? Because I was scared.
The Propensity for Quitting
Sometimes I wonder if I inherited that fear – and the propensity for quitting. My dad was the same way. The demons in his head were louder than anything else in the world. He couldn’t even hear himself breathe because they were so damn loud. So damn loud. He turned to alcohol again and again and again and eventually died from alcoholism at only 54 years old. I get it. I get that. I understand that deep level of despair. I do not feel shame in saying I want to quit. It is TRUE and real feeling, so how could there be shame.
Move Your Body and Your Head Will Follow
I sometimes wish I didn’t have the demons, the same ones I imagine my dad had. They are so loud and mean in my head and tell me all the time how nothing I do is worth it. Nothing I do is good enough. But I have learned to ignore them. Remember the movie “A Beautiful Mind” with Russel Crowe? Now, I do not have schizophrenia, but I am human and so wild thoughts, emotions and feelings rush through me just like they do for everyone. How do I power through? I move my body and my head ALWAYS follows.